You have a dysorthographic child and you want to help them. That is commendable. But between good intentions and good practices, the path is strewn with pitfalls. Many parents, despite their sincere investment, unknowingly repeat ineffective—even counterproductive—patterns. This article helps you identify these common traps and adopt a truly suitable supportive stance.
Trap no. 1: confusing dysorthographia with lack of effort or attention
This is the basic mistake, and it undermines the child’s confidence. Many parents think: «If my child just paid more attention, they wouldn’t write ‘comçon’ instead of ‘composition’.»
The reality is quite different. Dysorthographia is not a matter of willpower or concentration. It is a specific developmental disorder that affects the ability to absorb and automate spelling rules. The dysorthographic child does not «choose» their errors. They arise despite them, even when they know the rule.
Why is this a trap? If you send the implicit message «you could manage it if you really wanted to», you will reinforce guilt and anxiety, without solving the problem. The child sometimes works twice as hard as their classmates for half the results. Recognising this is already a way of helping them.
What to do instead: Value concrete effort, not the spelling result. Say «you thought carefully about this rule» rather than «it’s still wrong».
Trap no. 2: relying solely on dictations and mechanical repetition
Parents often think that copying out word lists a hundred times or daily dictations will «drill» spelling into the head. Unfortunately, for a dysorthographic person, brute repetition is rarely the solution.
Why? Because dysorthographia concerns memorising and integrating spelling regularities, not simply short-term memory. Copying the same word 50 times creates mental fatigue and frustration, without creating a lasting real «trace» in the spelling system.
Why is this a trap? These repetitive exercises discourage the child, consume time without proportionate results, and can widen the gap with the pleasure of writing.
What to do instead: Favour a multisensory approach. Use games (Scrabble, magnetic letters, fun apps), write stories together, create visual «posters» with keywords, and ask the child to invent mnemonic devices. Emotional engagement takes precedence over blind repetition.
Trap no. 3: neglecting the role of the speech therapist or specialist teacher
Some parents think they can «correct» dysorthographia on their own, without professional intervention. Others, on the contrary, place all the work on the speech therapist and think help at home is unnecessary.
Both extremes are mistaken.
Why is this a trap? A speech therapist assesses the disorder precisely and adapts an individualised rehabilitation plan. Without this, you risk applying generic techniques that do not match your child’s specific profile. Conversely, entrusting everything to a professional amounts to ignoring that the child spends most of their time outside the practice. Daily life is the real laboratory of dysorthographia.
What to do instead: Work in partnership. Ask the speech therapist which exercises to reinforce at home, what kind of feedback to use, which games to favour. Also make sure the school applies adjustments (extra time, differentiated correction, etc.). The child needs consistency across all their learning environments.
Trap no. 4: immediately and systematically correcting every written error
Your child shows you their homework. You see three mistakes in the first line. Your first reflex: point them out straight away. It is instinctive, maternal, logical. It is also counterproductive.
Immediate and massive correction causes several negative effects:
- It creates a cognitive overload: the child doesn’t know where to start.
- It reinforces the feeling of incapacity: «I get everything wrong».
- It does not help real progress, because the dysorthographic brain needs to process one or two targets at a time, not ten.
Why is this a trap? By receiving massive corrections over and over, the child loses interest in writing and loses the confidence they still have.
What to do instead: Choose one or two categories of errors to focus on this week (for example, subject-verb agreement, or invariable words). Let the others pass. This «progressive and targeted» approach is far more effective than an exhaustive hunt for mistakes.
Trap no. 5: forgetting that dysorthographia also affects self-esteem
Dysorthographia is often spoken of as a «school» disorder. But its consequences go well beyond grades. The child accumulates negative remarks («watch your mistakes», «another error»), compares themselves to classmates without difficulty, and ends up believing they are «useless at French» or «not intelligent».
This damage to self-esteem is just as important to address as the disorder itself.
Why is this a trap? A child in emotional distress does not learn. Anxiety blocks memorisation and worsens performance.
What to do instead:
- Regularly value their strengths («you have beautiful handwriting», «you always come up with good ideas»).
- Show them examples of famous dysorthographic or dyslexic people (writers, entrepreneurs, scientists). This takes the drama out of it and broadens horizons.
- Normalise the disorder: «You have a particularity, not a handicap. And you will find ways to adapt, like many people do.»
- Celebrate small victories. A word mastered, a sentence without error: these are worth highlighting.
Trap no. 6: offering ill-suited memory aids or tools
You have seen a spelling correction app. You install it, convinced it will revolutionise your child’s life. Or you buy them a large poster with all the spelling rules, thinking it will be enough for them to look at it.
The tool itself is never «the» solution. Worse, a poor tool can reinforce dependence or confusion.
Why is this a trap? Dysorthographic children do not lack resources; they need tools that they understand and accept. A complicated app or an overly dense poster will be ignored.
What to do instead:
- Test the tool with your child before generalising its use.
- Favour tools that they choose or co-build with you (a personalised word notebook, an illustrated dictionary at their level).
- Keep digital tools as support, not miracle solutions.
- Make sure the tool teaches, not just corrects.
Trap no. 7: separating spelling learning from the pleasure of reading and writing
Many families mentally separate «learning spelling» (a austere duty, a list of words) from «reading and writing for pleasure» (stories, comics, newspapers).
This is a major mistake. Spelling is also—and above all—learned through exposure. When you read regularly, you see words written correctly, and you build spelling intuitions.
Why is this a trap? If the child associates «spelling» with «boredom and effort», they will reduce their time of textual exposure. As a result, they get trapped in a negative loop.
What to do instead:
- Encourage reading for pleasure every day. Comics, manga, light novels, articles about their passions—all formats count.
- Read together, aloud, discussing the content.
- Write with them: annotated shopping lists, messages to friends, creating stories. The important thing is that writing becomes a communication tool, not a correction exercise.
- When you notice good spelling, point it out with enthusiasm: «Oh look, you wrote ‘exception’ correctly!»
Summary: towards a suitable parental stance
Helping a dysorthographic child is not about «saving» them from their mistakes. It is about supporting them in:
- Understanding that their disorder is not a personal failing.
- Developing practical and playful strategies suited to their profile.
- Rebuilding a positive self-esteem, despite spelling difficulties.
- Access to tools (professional, technological, relational) that free them from unnecessary obstacles.
You cannot «cure» dysorthographia. You can create an environment where the child feels supported, where writing remains a pleasure, and where small progress is visible and celebrated. That is what makes the real difference.
To go further
- Fédération Française des Dys: provides resource sheets and guides for parents facing written and oral language disorders.
- INSERM (Institut National de la Santé et de la Recherche Médicale): publishes scientific summaries on the origins and mechanisms of developmental disorders, including dysorthographia.
- MDPH (Maison Départementale des Personnes Handicapées): helps with directing families to professionals and preparing files for school adjustments (extra time, secretarial support, etc.).
